Campus Speaker Recounts
Stories of Domestic Violence

By Lindsay Carlson
CyberNews Staff Reporter

March 12, 2002

Vera Anderson said Tuesday it wasn't until she heard the stories of other battered women that she realized she, too, was a victim of domestic violence. In a forum at Bulldog Theater in Olmsted Center, Anderson said even though the abuse is over the effects still linger. "I have so many barbwires up," Anderson said. In her book " A Woman Like You: The Face of Domestic Violence," Anderson gives the accounts of women who have also dealt with the hardships of abuse. Anderson is a photojournalist and author who tours the United States speaking about domestic violence.

Anderson said she had experienced abuse from her husband, but she added it wasn't until years after while volunteering at a California prison that she realized she was a victim of domestic violence. Anderson said while driving home from the prison she began to cry. "Realizing that their story and my story were all the same story," Anderson said was the turning point for her. Up until then, Anderson said she had never thought of herself as a victim of domestic violence. "I just thought I had a bad marrriage," Anderson said.

In talking about her ex-husband, Anderson said while getting to know him, she was attracted to his dark side and felt loving him would change him. She said the abuse started out of jealousy and obsession, and eventually she left him. Anderson said even after the divorce, her ex-husband wouldn't get over it. In time, she said, he married again, shot and killed his wife, and then took his own life.

Anderson said her interest in educating others about domestic violence began after hearing the stories of inmates at a California prison where she volunteered. She said a year passed before she was able to bring a camera into the facility. Anderson said she interviewed hundreds of battered women, including some of the women's accounts in her book "A Woman Like You: The Face of Domestic Violence." Anderson said her book depicts the domestic struggles of 34 women.

"The broken spirit is much worse than the broken bones," Anderson said describing some of the women in her book. Anderson said one abused woman began to view herself throught the eyes of her batterer, questioning her own worth. Anderson said a woman by the name of Jane felt she lost her personhood due to an abusive relationship. Anderson said Kimberly, another abused woman, had become so emotionally warped an earthquake literally was unable to provoke fear in her.

Anderson said batterers don't fall into one social category. "I don't think there is a profile, but there are things for a girl to look for," Anderson said. After speaking to a group of batterers, Anderson said she had found that offenders included some men who were scientists, athletes and professors. Anderson said the majority of the domestic offenders unfortunately are likely to do it again. Anderson said, "Domestic violence has spiked back up since Sept. 11."

Anderson said she still feels the effects of being in an abusive relationship, though she's been living with another man for the past 10 years. Anderson said, "It's hard to have a normal relationship after you've had an obsessive relationship." She said she still puts up boundaries. "You step over that line and you're out," Anderson said about her relationship.

Anderson said she's now looking for more women willing to share their stories for her next book project. She said anyone willing or anyone who knows someone willing to be interviewed may contact her at (323) 935-8666 or e-mail her at veracruise@msn.com. Anderson said that all communications would be strictly confidential.